Where have you been???

Why do I want to start every post with “OK”? 

I got a job and started September 4.  Been at it a month and I like it.  So much less stress that the previous job not because of the work but because of the people.  I hope this continues to be so.  I will make sure my attitude is in check and make sure to see the sunny side of things? 

B is doing great.  She was proud of me for getting a better job.  We got her class ring ordered.  Do you know those suckers cost about $600?  But it is a memory for her and I think it is worth it.  I still have my class ring.  She has all A’s in school.  Today her and hubby are on their third college visit.  She knows where she wants to go but I think she should see other schools to make a fully informed decision. 

B is finally starting to make friends at school.  She has a group of friends and they hang out at school and after and on weekends.  Yea.  Huge step for her.  She put herself out there and made friends.  We know some of them from church and we have met them all and they are nice and polite.  They will come and pick her up to go somewhere and they come to the door to say HI. 

My hives are still here.  I do notice that they are worse when I have wheat products therefore I am trying to be as gluten free as possible.  I am also limiting my dairy products since wheat and dairy allergies tend to go hand in hand.  Why yes Andi you were correct as always (thanks for holding me accountable).

I have been a total slacker in the exercise area and I plan to change that starting this week.  I really miss having a free workout center at work.  But there is a YMCA I pass on the way home and I will go and check that out today.  I can’t let that be an excuse. 

Not much else is going on in my world.  I promise to blog better. 

I got a job!

Lets all do the happy dance! 

I gave my 2 weeks notice today and I will start my brand new job September 4. 

This journey has been hard but not unbearable.  Thank you to those that listened when I whined. 

B is doing great in her new year of school.  She is taking Algebra 2 (bleh), Spanish 2 (bleh), Family and Marriage (wtf), Chemistry (loved it).  She is driving herself to school and church and is getting much better.  She went to the dentist for her 6 month check up and she has 3 more cavities but the dentist said those were not her fault but more “fallout” from the lack of dental care as a child.  She really likes the dentist and is not scared.  Such a trooper.  And no word from here mom.  Can you believe it has been 9 months with us and still has not seen her mom. 

Looking forward to the new adventure at the new job.  Stay tuned.

Forward 1 back 2

I think it is time we evolve from SD2 to B.  She is my child to my heart and I am her mother for all practical purposes.  She is such a good kid and we never use the term STEP anymore when referring to each other.  Kinda cool huh?  What a journey this has been. 

Appears that PEW, her evil mom(HEM) and SD1 (which still remain SD1) have all kissed and made up.  When I talked to B about this she says it is all for show and so they can now all turn their efforts to tormenting us.  They can’t take B back because PEW signed her over.  She is not paying any child support or for anything.  I am just dissapointed in SD1.  She did come to visit her dad this weekend (first time she has acknowledged him since March) and she pulled the weepy “they are beating me and yelling at me all the time at HEM’s house”.  We all asked why do you stay when you know you can come here.  She just looked blank, packed her stuff and returned to HEM’s house (this would be SD1 & B’s evil grandmother).  Okay then you have made your choices and you choice is to go where you get the most stuff and the least amount of effort regardless of the atmosphere.  Again – your choice. 

I will make sure B is safe at school and I have blocked her PEW and HEM from her phone and I am about to block SD1 from her phone. 

In other news… I am still job hunting.  I hope to maybe have a door either open or close by the end of the week.  This has been exhusting for almost 2 months looking but at least I am still employeed while looking.  My goal is to take some time off in between jobs to visit my sister and hang out with her.  It has been too long.  I didn’t travel much because I didn’t like to leave Anna so that is something that I have a little more time for.

B is loving Vacation Bible School at chuch this week.  She is having a blast.  She starts school is 1 week.  I can’t believe 11th grade.  She is kinda freaked out about it too!  This is the year we look for colleges, take ACT tests and prep for Senior year.  Weeeee!!

Still here

Sorry I feel off the face of the earth and I just climbed back on.  I will try to catch you up. 

Yes, I am still losing my job at some point of time by October 1.  Still have not been given any information.  I have been searching for jobs for the last 45 days.  This week I have had 2 phone interviews and I interview with my 7th agency.   I have 20 active resumes out there and I have only heard from 1.  I am not giving up and I will just continue to plus away until something comes up.  It does get a little tiring but I can’t image not having a job!! 

SD2 is doing great.  Such a great kid.  She has her full drivers license.  She had been driving herself places and is doing great.  She had a blast at church camp and over all a great summer.  She starts school 14 days from today and I have not even thought about it.  I will freak out on August 1 which is the  day she starts and figure it out from there. 

SD1 has not been around much but she did finally call her dad just to say Hi.  She is going back to community college in the fall.  Maybe she will take more than 1 class and maybe she will pass that 1 class.  But I doubt it.   Still no job and her grandparents are back to their evil ways.  Tell me you are not surprised but hubby has cut all communication with them he will only speak to SD1 directly. 

Life is busy being life.  I have not been able to workout the last 2 weeks because we had a water main break at work and it flooded the workout center.  It should be up and going for next week so I will resume my Insanity workout.  I have missed it these last 2 week. 

My hives have returned.  It is so weird because they appeared 5 years to the day (plus or minus a day) from the last time they appeared.  The last time they lasted almost 10 months so I know I am in the for the long haul and what to expect this time.  But last time I was not job searching.  I try to to scratch while on interviews (what a strange monkey girl she is scratching all the time). 

Movies I have seen, hummm I remember seeing 127 hours.  It was good, much better than I expected.  I gave it 3 stars. 

Cooking has been spotty at best as we are scattered all the time and I have become more gluten free with the hives – my body does not need to fight 2 battles at the same time!! 

 

 

Today

I think the reality of losing my job has hit me really hard today.  Totally unmotived, totally sad and scared.  I can’t do without a pay check.  The 60 notice letters will begin being sent out on July 1.  I hope and pray I am not in that group. 

Wow,  May was a hard month.  I did have flashbacks of Anna laying there dead on Saturday.  I was so sad.  I could never love like I loved her and I can’t hurt like I did when she left.   It truly hurt as much as when my mom died. 

I have been sending out resumes on a daily basis and letting everyone know that I am looking for a job and passing out my resume like candy at halloween.  I am really scared. 

I finished the first month of Insanity – yes I did miss a week while I was gone on vacation.  Next week starts Month 2 and those are MAX everything.  This week is cardio and balance plus I got a new 20 minute fast and furious video to add to the mix. 

So work sucks.  Life is okay.  Nothing new or exciting.  If you need me I will be in the corner in the fetal position.

Back into action

So in May (7th) my dog died.  Very sad.  Lots of happy memories and stories to tell.

Then in May (31st) I found out I would be losing my job.  So I took a vacation – it was already planned.

Gulf Shores was great.  We were on a private beach and the sand was great.  I got a tan and checked out of reality for a few days. SD2 had a great time on her first ever real vacation.  She liked just hanging out at the beach also.

Then we returned. I had a phone interview but no call back.  I have sent out 10 resumes and I have a recruiter meeting later this week.  I am trying to be as proactive as possible as I know jobs will start being cut August 30.  I would much rather leave with a job then without.  I am still in the shock stage but I also know I need to get my ducks in a row. 

I miss being able to tell Anna about all of this as she would just love me regardless. 

Watched “Due Date”  Meh not that great and “To Save a Life” which was good (surprise). 

I grilled out Saturday night and Sunday made ham and cheese quiche.  Family liked both. 

I am on Week 3 of the Insanity workout.  I didn’t lose too much ground being off it for a week on vacation.  Monday was 55 minutes and it was brutal but felt great.  I feel that my cardio strength is the best it has ever been and I love the intense 40 minute workouts.  Bam then you are done.  I am looking forward to staying with this.

Numbers game

Today I submitted 10 resume’s.  It is a numbers game.  Get my resume out there and maybe 1 in 10 will get a hit for an interview. 

I have 3 employment agencies that I am in contact with and will start meeting with after vacation.

Here is it

Yesterday my company was bought out.  That translates to I have lost my job.  Marriott bought us and since we are a corporate office we are not needed anymore.  In 30 days they will give us our exit date.  All jobs will be gone by October 1. 

My brain is swimming to say the least.  I am sad, I am scared, I am unsure.  I have been putting my resume out there like  crazy because I know 200+ other folks here are doing the same thing. This is the first time I have lost a job. When I get to the other side of this storm I can’t wait to see how I come out. 

I miss Anna because she would be my safe place to go.  She doesn’t understand scared just love. 

We got SD2 a car last weekend.  It is a 2003 Honda Element.  Yes a big blue box.  Safe and practical.  Not a fast engine at all and low on insurance premiums!  She was beyond excited and has been practicing her driving because July 12 she will be up and driving alone.  You have been warned. 

We watched “Megamind” last weekend.  It was funny and cute.  I gae it 4 stars. 

I did quite a bit of cooking at the first of the week.  BBQ chicken, smothered steak, meatloaf, chocolate pie, blackberry cobbler.  I love when I have a holiday so I can slow the pace down and spend some time in the kitchen. 

We leave for vacation Sunday to the beach.  And boy am I glad.  I will put the job search aside for a week and regroup then hit it hard again when I get back. 

I do not want to wait for a severance package if I can help it because I need a job and a pay check and I cannot risk being in a gap. 

I am finishing up Week 2 of Insanity and I am still in love with it.  I am getting in much better shape because I don’t have to stop as much during the workout.  It is brutal but exactly what I need right now.  I will miss my free workout center and work out buddies when this job is over. 

I will miss our rocking christmas parties too.

Reviews

I started the Insanity workout this week.  After the fit test and day 1 I really like it.  It is really hard but I like the pace.  I will let you know how I feel in a few days, right now my calves are screaming mean words to me. 

I tried the new Dole Shakers.  They are fruit smoothies on the go.  We don’t own a blender so I don’t make smoothies at home (plus I doubt I would make them).  Thes are made with fruit and yogurt.  You just add juice and shake.  Great for taking to work.   I really like them. 

Watched “Catch and Release” on DVD the other day.  Really good.  I give it 4 stars.  It is a drama but not depressing.  Just a good movie.  Kinda makes you feel good in the end. 

Life without Anna is fine.  I miss her everyday and look for her everywhere.  I have her ashes but I am not ready to bury her yet so she will stay in her box for now. 

SD2 only has a week of school left.  We head to the beach when she gets out.  YEA!!

Monday again

Most of you already know but I need to put it in writing. Anna died a week ago today.  She got sick on Friday and went very quickly.  The cancer returned and attacked her spinal column.  I stayed with her until her last breath.  I must have smelled her feet a million times because I never want to forget her smell.  She has been creamated and is in a beautiful box.  Right now I am not at a point where I want to bury her.  So she (now the box) will stay with me. 

I watched “The Other Guys” with Will Ferrel while I was home for 2 days.  It was okay I give it 3 stars. 

New life is back to normal.  SD2 is plugging away at school.  She only has 3 weeks left.  We leave for Gulf Shores MS for a week of the beach when she is done with school.  Much needed beach R&R time. 

Hubby returned from Cuba safe and sound.  Back on the hamster wheel for him. 

SD2 mom did not make any effort to see SD2 for mother’s day.  She still has not seen her and hates to have to talk to her on the phone.  We asked her if she wanted to buy her a mothers day card and she said no.  She is a good kid and her mom is missing out but hubby and I love every minute we have with her.